One of my favourite quotes is by Carl Jung: ” One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light but by making the darkness conscious.”  This resonates with me so much, I think, because I’ve spent the last 10 years reading, listening to, absorbing, mimicking, and meditating on the following mantras: “Just think positive thoughts.”; “All we are is love and light.”; “This too will pass.”; “Transcend your ego.” 

I have pages and pages of words in countless journals asking, no, pleading, with God or the Universe to please help me be better and rid myself of negativity. I think to myself, “God please help me be more loving, more compassionate, more understanding.” Let me just go ahead and say, nothing is wrong with praying for these things, but not once did I ever stop to think that perhaps I’m not embodying these traits I so desperately seek for a reason.

When Hillary Clinton was Secretary of State, she received an email on April 2, 2011 from Sidney Blumenthal, Hillary’s unofficial intelligence operative, which focused on France’s motivations for joining the war against Gaddafi in Libya. In the email, she writes how Gaddafi had “nearly bottomless financial resources” to continue his campaign against the rebels, and although the freezing of Libya’s bank accounts presented challenges for him, he had managed to circumvent this by having up to 143 tons of gold and similar amount in silver, amounting to $7 billion, that was kept outside the Libyan Central Bank.

It then states that he acquired the gold prior to the rebellion “to establish a pan-African currency based on the Libyan golden Dinar.” His plan was to offer a competing currency in the African region to rival the French Franc, which was the currency predominately used in the area. Blumenthal then writes, “French intelligence officers discovered this plan shortly after the current rebellion began, and this was one of the factors that influenced President Nicolas Sarkozy’s decision to commit France to the attack on Libya.”

Happiness. It’s a loaded word. We are constantly trying to understand it so that we can incorporate it into our lives. We try to define our happiness by all the little things that make up our existence. Does our appearance make us happy? Does our health make us happy? Do we feel fulfilled enough in our jobs to feel happy? Are we in love? Do we have a family? Do these things determine our happiness radar, too? And then, once we mull over these things, we measure just how much each aspect of our lives makes us happy. And then we question if we could be happier. It’s a strange and vicious cycle that, ultimately, has you asking many more questions than simply living from a place of peace.

And then, of course, there’s the day-to-day things that give us bursts of immediate happiness. They are so different for each person. It could be as trivial as a bite of chocolate; as easy as curling up on the couch for a movie. Perhaps it’s stepping out for a long and indulgent run, rain or shine, the fresh air smacking you in the face as your blood pumps rapidly throughout your body. Happiness, as we know it, seems like something internal. Until now.