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I remember it quite clearly lying in agonizing pain laboring my third child. My unborn son was in a position preventing his imminent birth. I was at home with my midwife sensing that things weren’t progressing as they should, as they did with my previous births. Time had slowed to a crawl yet I wasn’t making it any closer to the finishing line.
In this time I never worried or became anxious. Somehow in this moment I knew surrender was the way. I fell into rhythm with a force outside myself and through the process of having my son’s position manipulated through 2 excruciating contractions I surrendered.
In my surrender I knowingly trusted that all as it should be and that no matter what, in some fashion, there would be a conclusion.
I couldn’t define how I would get there. I couldn’t worry my way through in self-made scenarios. I relinquished control and surrendered to a force that was with me, one that was always with me.