Can it be you whose sense of frustration leads to defeat? Can it be you who allows your own frustration to have mastery over you? This is not at all what you desire, for you defeat yourself. Instead, you could be moving forward.
You pull your own hair, and then you cry. Hah, you are your own antagonist when you could just as well be your own blessing-maker. You cast yourself in the role of the underdog when you have better roles to cast yourself in.
Start undercutting your frustration rather than fighting it. Regard your frustration from a higher rung on the ladder. You are capable, not incapable. No one makes you be frustrated. You assign that role to yourself, and you dash off with it.
This applies to anxiety and helplessness, as if assigning them to you, you get off free. No one makes you frustrated, anxious, and powerless but you. You may be looking to let go of responsibility. You will do well not to sign yourself up to your own excuses.
To stay stuck is a way to postpone your own Life, and so you may practice malingering from responsibility. You don’t want to hide yourself under a cloak of inability due to one imposed rationale or another.
Fortunate is the person who works forty or fifty or sixty hours a week. He or she has no time to major in how he feels. Beloveds, the idea of focusing on yourself and how you feel stretched isn’t a good idea. Better to leave your questions unasked than to pander to them.
Frustration and anxiety and inability lead you nowhere but to more of themselves.
Forget about them. You have been your own strict inquisitor, and it is you who catches yourself in a trap. It is you who squeezes your jugular and you who calls it survival. It is you who accuses you and, at the same moment, excuses you. It is you who asks yourself self-defeating questions. It is you who keeps narrowing your vision. It is you who puts yourself on trial.
It is you who is your jury. You give yourself no quarter when you sneak under the fence. You fault yourself when, to you, a fault means blame. Somehow, claiming to be an honest person, you blame yourself and, therefore, run away in order to get out of all kinds of responsibility. Whether the responsibility is to yourself, to Me, to family or to friends, or to the world and the vast Universe beyond, you defame yourself. You obviate yourself from taking responsibility by feeling helpless.
Something made you do it -- or not do it. You let yourself off too easily. You materialize excuses aka reasons out of thin air.
You pin your blame on something outside you, something you objectify as outside you. Even when you may make a heroic gesture and pin the blame on yourself, you may turn yourself into a self-actualizing hapless martyr. Either way, you foist off your responsibility. The buck does fall on you, yet you slip away from it.
Perhaps you blame your culpability on your sensitivity. Are you speaking for yourself or against yourself? Whose side are you on? Rally your thoughts. Bring them in like cattle for the night.
You may ask yourself a whole lot of questions, and become like the matador who pricks the bull lightly with his sword, trying to get a reaction from the bull. You may play the dual roles of the matador and the innocent bull, even as you put your hands up to show you have no tricks up your sleeve.
Beloveds, you pull the wool over your own eyes. Do you see this now? Look Me straight in the eye as you answer, and We will go places.
Permanent link to this Heavenletter: http://heavenletters.org/let-s-get-going.html - Thank you for including this when publishing this Heavenletter elsewhere.