God said:
What would make you absent yourself from Me as if I do not exist? Sometimes you may have shrouded Me in dark colors and pulled a curtain as if to close Me out, as if you could drum Me out of your thoughts, as if you could silence the beat of My heart and evict Me from your daily life or even the glory-filled heights of your life.
It isn’t that you want to do Me in, not at all. It’s just that you see Me as someone who is out to take your happiness away and perhaps browbeat you into behavior unbefitting a happy-go-lucky character such as you. Only, you are not so happy go-lucky, and you haven’t been in a long time, although you may try to persuade yourself that you are doing very well without Me altogether, even better perhaps than you would with Me in your patronage.
I am not your spoiler of good times. Good times used to be good times, yet now they may not be good times for you anymore. They are times that pass, yet something is missing. A meaning is missing. It seems that the good times are missing, or even that time is missing. Something has skipped a beat here.
Time doesn’t seem to stop any longer. It is just gone, and the hilarity is also gone, like the blowing out of a candle at the end of a birthday celebration. The celebration is over. Somehow something has trespassed on your good, and you can’t find your good. You can’t even pretend it anymore to yourself.
You don’t know what to pretend. You feel like a pretender to the throne. For sure, you don’t know any throne to sit on that is right for you no matter what.
You would like to stir up a good time, yet it takes too much effort. Good time just doesn’t seem to be there.
Once you used to laugh out loud at the jokes you heard. Now you wonder what is the pay-off in the jokes. Is everyone pretending that a joke is funny, or worth telling, or worth anything at all? You have heard all the jokes again and again. You have heard everything before somewhere sometime. You can’t forget it, though you can’t remember just yet where or when you heard it - perhaps you heard it somewhere in the recesses of where your heart used to be.
How can you be absent from your own life? How can you go through the motions and not feel them? Have you numbed yourself? Has your heart moved to arctic regions when you were not looking and your eyes are frosted over?
Beloveds, you who may feel locked out – yet you hold the key. Let yourself back in. The door is not locked. You just have to turn the knob on the entrance to your heart, and you will leave all the ice behind. Just forgive yourself for what it is that you feel has to be refitted. Just be. Untie yourself from the choked past.
It is not yourself that you let go of. It is your Self that you find and wrap around the world. Then you are your Self still as a core within you, and also your Self very evident outside you to the very rim of the world and around all the beyond as I am beyond. Where We are as One, there are no limits.
You come in and out of Vastness and yet never leave Vastness. You are Vastness wherever you may be. And you are a Tour Guide for others as I am. You fill hearts. You take them with you. We are alike. We are the same to the extent that there is only Oneness, Oneness, Oneness.
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