There is but one single word on my heart this morning. A word I would much prefer to put in the mailbox and send back to the universe.
Responsibility.
We hear this word, do our best to own it in our life. However, the human tenancy is to be surface seekers and application-ers. Present company included.
I feel it is safe to say we all understand and take responsibility for the life we are living, what we have created to date as our external as well as internal reality, but what about the things we haven’t created??
How often do we just poo poo that thought away by saying: “ohhhh it just wasn’t meant to be.” What a great escape line we have given to our selves. It is our ego ticket out of responsibility for what our SOUL seeks.
Yesterday, while I was writing my morning sharing, just that teeny little part of my Electrifying Indian who consistently shows himself at my front door… energy and all… and feels more real, more solid each time I glance at him, I heard so clearly, to let him in, I have to open the door.
That stunned me for a long minute (all thru the day really.) I think, I even dare say, scared me. Which really surprised me.
I have to open the damn door. That is filled with a depth of meaning. But I have walked this crazy and wonderful path long enough to know, once a door is opened, there is NO CLOSING IT! And I am not talking just opening it a crack, peeking out or in, then closing it back up again. I know the karmic retributions of that game!! Ain’t doing that again!
I am hoping, in sharing my story, my understandings of what is at hand and my responsibility within it, it will help deepen your own story. Allow you the courage to open the greatest doorway of your life. This is funny, even as I type that out, I suddenly know it is the doorway to our West Field. The field of harvest… where the long-held dream within the heart IS the Reality.
Phew.
Along with being responsible for what we choose to create, we must back it all up with action. …but not before we have sufficient lessons and understandings of application, otherwise, we create landmines for ourselves (obviously we need those landmines to get us back on course, but we don’t have to have them.)
I have to look at the 12 years that got me to Here, there were three major themes that played out consistently. Energy, Synergy, Kundalini.
All three vital to the times we are in right Here and Now… inseparable even… at least for what is peeking into my front door!! (smile)
Everything in life is made of energy. Every molecule of energy emits a frequency. We express in a world where like attracts like. Molecular frequencies find and bind to their likeness. This becomes expressed as a field of light (that is what I read from.)
You and I unfold in a field of high vibrational frequency, holding together the expression of the incoming Light as it applies to the field in which you are being read from. So with that, I see your greatest potential that exists in this present moment, even if your mind/ego wants to say otherwise. That is the hazard of the ego… and the internal work we must diligently do.
Our personal choices that we make in any given moment create the external “landmines” to help release the egoic hold of false perceptions within our chosen reality. The gift is to understand the fullness of any given landmine without blaming someone or something outside of yourself. You will find, the landmines become an amazing adventure too. Because at the end of any given day… there is no matter. There is nothing outside of yourself. You have created, energetically, your experiences thru a day to help you become more fully and completely YOU.
So, my electric Indian (smile)… it almost feels weird to call him Jorge, perhaps the word is actually inaccurate.
He appeared on this field, out of the Mesa Rock looking and feeling so much like my first true and real (as real as I would allow) love George and even taking on an alternate of that name ad appearance, keeping the vibration similar, yet different. I was 14-17 years old when George and I were in love. He allowed me to feel safe in a loving relationship. I had so much anger, vengeance and serious insecurity around anything that vibrated love, I eventually fled the scene when he started hinting at marriage. Commitment…. holy shit batman!!
He truly was a gift unto my soul and my life.
Little did I know (until just now) this was the first time that which I call Jorge, his soul energy entered my created life via the human named George. (I would have never, in a million lifetimes, guessed that!!) No wonder he looks and feels so much like him….dah!!
Now, lets really complicate things (smile)… enter my (eventual) husband 9 years later. I was not even remotely attracted to that man and yet, one crazy day, I just fell in love with him. This is what is being referred to (in my inner hearing as I learn this story as I type) as an “overlay.”
Jorge overlaid his energy signature on the man I called Eddie, to make sure our journey together happened. Eddie was there to help me face many dark aspects of myself, and he did that so well. He also helped me break thru my really poor self-image and hidden (crippled) sexuality. He played his part perfectly and so lovingly. All of this too, was conspiring to bring in my last child. I would have never gotten pregnant without the safety and security of my life with Eddie again. I had already been a single mom twice, and I vowed to never go there again. Hard would be an understatement.
The very day…. VERY DAY my daughter was born, Jorge removed his overlay. My in-love place with this man… gone. Like it never existed before. My sexual desire for him went with it all too.
It crushed me to no end. To the point of getting into counselling (again) as well as admitted myself into a psych hospital. I was sure that in-love thing must have just gotten shaken loose thru the child-birth process. I needed to be in-love with this man, because without it… I just didn’t like him any longer. The mirrors were now shattering my illusion.
Four years later, I finally got up the nerve to divorce him…. thank you dear lord. The more I tried to stay in that relationship, the sicker I got. But I surely didn’t look at life like that then…. at all!!
So now, fast forward to my life in my Holy bathtub in 2001. My mentor from across the pond. The day he showed up in a chatroom I was in, everything in my body kicked in. I felt him like nothing I have ever felt before. I was barely 3 full months into meditation… so what I felt, I discounted and it left me very confused as to how is it possible to feel this man so much just from sitting in a chatroom on a computer.
It is so funny to take this stroll down memory lane and see how everything really fits together now. There were two other ladies in the room with me prior to his entrance. They were there helping me come to grips with a reality view that day by day was crumbling and they held my hand and heart steady thru it all. The moment he came into the chatroom, both of them went on alert. They started sending me all kinds of protection, which really really baffled me. I never understood the why of their actions until now.
They felt his magnetic influence on my own magnetic field. There was a synergy taking place I could not conceive of. His presence, his soul energy… indomitable. I didn’t fear him at all… quite the opposite really, I just wanted to move into his energy and live there.
We became friends and he, thru his beautiful elusiveness, my mentor and eventual kundalini exchange partner (even tho he was not what I would call a conscious participant, his soul showed up and that was good enough for me!!)
Thru this amazing year and a half exchange, he opened up parts of me I didn’t even know existed. Phew.
But alas, we eventually went off on our own journeys separately, *sigh.* Leaving a question thru my own field of space and time… what if…
Enter Frank in 2006. Another overlay experience. To be able to witness myself, the chemical change of falling in love, coupled with a momentary experience of sexual energy outside of the physical body. My dangling carrot so I never lost focus and interest in the rest of the story! Again, once that overlay was removed, there was no feeling of connection, even the in-love lifted to a wholeness of love as in friendship.
And then, my most recent journey of wonder was another overlay of Jorge, for the physical experience needed.
And now… I really understand so much I never understood before. With both George and my mentor, I am still very deeply in-love with them that feeling never left or even subsided at all.
All the others along the way… I am so grateful for, and love them for the exchange we have had, no matter how long or how little… but not the same vibration in my heart energy and once that overlay is removed, the connection is completely removed.
Every single encounter, relationship, experience within it all…. all designed to open me (each of us) to this very moment in time.
The electric field with a body peering into my front door. He comes with the intense physical attraction I had with George and amplifies the soul energy of my mentor, the two together sends lightning bolts thru my reality… which is once again, dissolving in construct!!
I know, if I open that door, everything within my reality construct WILL change. That which has been intimately taught to me for the last 12 years, will open into facilitation and creation.
Once I heard that it is my responsibility to open that door to allow the fullness of him in, I also was able to see the grid-work of energy that was started with Rick and I. When (because truly, there is no “if” in my world) I let him in, we will fire that grid into its greatest and fullest potential!
Yikes.
Every single person has been unfolding your greatest and highest potential to Here… for full entrance into what has been called “The Promised Land.” But you are responsibly for understanding your journey to here. We cannot enter blind or full of ourselves (small s there.)
I really do get that phrase now “Aware is not Awake.” Mine has been a story of awareness to Here. One that was absolutely needed. I shall open the door to Awaken to the greater REALity waiting to come in.
Gulp.
There is no doubt, my story is your story. Are you willing to take action and be responsible for the dream you have sought thru eons of time and open the doorway for it to commence?
Yesterday, I was really avoiding anything spiritual after I got done with my day. I knew tho, it was time to put a few classes together to help us all facilitate opening our doorways to the Promised Land.
I have two meditation classes (beginners and advanced) set up and an energy class that all start on July 15th and will run 6 weeks. I have them mentioned on my reading page, set up in my online booking calendar, later this afternoon I will have a full webpage detailing the classes set up. Truly, they are self-explanatory (or should be.) But will get that webpage done after all my readings today. It will be at: www.mysoulcenter.com/classes.html
I have also created a special reading package called 3-4-2 Reading Package. Every single day is changing both our internal and external energy fields and is picking up speed minute by minute. So I created a buy 2 get the third reading free, only applies to 30 minute readings and all must be used by the end of August. www.mysoulcenter.com/energy_readings.html
I WILL open that door today and let the Bold Games Begin in earnest!!
To all of us Boldly going where few have gone before… ((((((HUGZ))))) of adventure, wonder and wild electricity!!
Lisa Gawlas
