HJ: You’re a kind, loving, generous, caring, conscious person… but are you letting that get in the way of your true, authentic self? It’s a problem many of us face — we don’t want to hurt or offend people so we don’t always say what we feel inside. We are kind… to a fault, which serves no one. You see, not saying what you feel compelled to say (as long as you are coming from a genuine, centered place) — being too nice — is actually hurting you and the other person.
You are covering up your true, authentic self and keeping the other person from something they may desperately need to hear. It may not always be a comfortable thing to say or do, but that doesn’t mean it cannot have major benefits in the long (or even short) term for that person. It’s the classic story of the emperor with no clothes. Everyone was too afraid to tell him he was naked! Often times you may be bringing something to the awareness of another person that they desperately need to hear, but are too confused or in denial to figure out themselves.
Personally, if I am way out of line (or someone feels strongly that I am), I welcome them to tell me. I know that as long as they are not coming from a place of hurt or fear, that its genuinely meant to help me. It’s a sign of caring. Telling someone something you think may help them — even if they might get bent out of shape — is a gesture of kindness and compassion… and it’s an expression of your true self.
On the other side of the coin, being too nice can lead other people to take advantage of or walk all over you, which is also not a healthy pattern to be engaged in.
