DEEPLY AWAKE – WEED

I think it's fascinating to watch judgments crumble.

It is one of the most thrilling things in the world to feel the scales fall off my eyes, and something that once just confounded me, or angered me, or filled me with resentment or fear, how every now and then someone or something comes along to right it, to make it straight and true, and in a blink of an eye, I am in a clearer state, see things as part of the whole, smile a little, relax a lot, and then the real thinking, not the crazy circular thinking, can begin.

Such is the way with many things. I think of the big judgments I have held, and it is often difficult to pinpoint the faulty belief, the lie I am telling myself that is causing distress. Unable to solve the koan, the outside, my reality, calls to me, to solve a problem, to address an issue, to create once again something that will have meaning to myself and to others. I externalize, and I learn, and then it comes home, I integrate, I change, I move on and address myself and others just a little differently then.

It is facile to say simply that because I create my own reality, everything is at my beck and call. It really matters on which ledge of the vibratory mountain one shouts that from. I can say that from littlemind, and then, the world is full of frustrating situations in which I am victim, being ground down by the will of others, and I am creating it, and woe is me.

DEEPLY AWAKE – NOW

There are a few things that I understand now that I did not understand previously. I am grateful for all the time I chose to spend squirreling away this knowledge from myself. It was very helpful to have spent so very many years in voluntary confinement. Just this side of sanity, I have finally stood in a light which has made all things right, all things clear, all things beautiful.

Let me explain.

I have now been introduced to Bashar, re-introduced. I understand that the black triangle I saw, well, it was only half true, the story I chose to give myself about it. The UFO overlay, the abduction and release story, all true, to a point. But it was not just I who had been cloaked.

The Teachers opened my energetic doors, reminded me of the language of a race I am very aligned with. Gave me the language, the structure of thought, to begin a journey which would lead to going as far into physical reality as I ultimately chose to go.

I sat listening to Bashar's explanation of the 9 levels of consciousness, and the last 15 minutes were actually nothing more than a love letter from a dear dear friend, finally asserting itself within a physical structure which could finally, after all these years, contain that much light. I sat, those last fifteen minutes of the video, or so, sitting in my recliner, and laughing my ass off. Honestly. I laughed until I cried, and then I laughed some more. Most all the lights are finally back on. Ha!

Yesterday was an unusually brilliant day. I left the house at 1:30, walked to the store, and then, because I had more than enough time, I walked through the park. Not on the paths, no, on the grass, between the trees, beside the still waters of our little creek.

DEEPLY AWAKE – MY FAVORITE MARTIAN

What a grand few days I have had. Three 12 hour shifts, back to back, in the psych ward. The first two nights were sainted. Gentle, sweet, quiet, loving and sainted. Patients and staff being kind and gentle to each other and to themselves. How blessed.

And then the third shift, among very cold and mean staff, unpleasant and closed and petty and resistant. By the third shift, my endurance was lower, and it was easier to sink into the sad, lower frequency agreement fields.

Through it all I have been sleeping very deeply, and being given sweet dreams. I was visited by a symbol of on old, great love, and now know that my relationship is on its way. The symbol sat there smiling, so still and so loving, and asked, “So, how do you feel?” I said without thinking of consequence, “I love you,” those words symbolizing my willingness to move forward without fear, within the unified field of interconnectedness, to give and receive love and bliss in the now.

This morning I was greeted by old friends. I stumbled upon the “official video” for the wayshowers, and WOW did the gongs get gonged. Wow, I have watched it several times now. Wow. My tribe.

And then, I stumbled onto Bashar.