God said:
You may have been seeking a panacea for life. You would like a cure. You might like to be on the sidelines, someone wise and wonderful who looks on life as if from a distance and nods sagely without being as affected by life as you presently are. Yes, somewhat above it all. Out of the fray. Out of the worry and concern. Simply a researcher doing research. “Ah, that’s how it is,” you say.
In a way you are an observer. You observe life going on right in front of you. You may feel that life hammers you, pulls you up and pulls you down. You don’t know what to expect of life. Life treats you as it wills, and you don’t quite grasp how to treat life as yet. You can’t quite get the hang of it. You’ve tried everything, yet you get flummoxed one way or another each time. You shake hands with life. You jump into life. You meet life half way. You run away from life, and you do the same things over and over again, yet life is always at least one step ahead of you. Sometimes you give up on life.
You may say to yourself: “Okay, I quit. I give up. I will expect nothing from life,” yet you keep on expecting right and left, and you are disappointed, disheartened, and aggrieved. You have an ax to grind with life, and you grind it. You grit your teeth. You just can’t seem to get a handle on life. Life outsmarts you with not so much as a by- your-leave.