“Parenting is one of the most challenging, demanding, and stressful jobs on the planet. It is also one of the most important, for how it is done influences in great measure the heart and soul and consciousness of the next generation, their experience of meaning and connection, their repertoire of life skills, and their deepest feelings about themselves and their possible place in a rapidly changing world.” ~ Jon and Myla Kabat-Zinn, Everyday Blessings: The Inner Work of Mindful Parenting
What I see time and time again, in parenting magazines and articles discussing whether time-outs on the naughty step are setting healthy boundaries or entirely damaging our un-spoilt little creatures of love. Or perhaps debating over how best to deal with a tantrum – to smother them in hugs and kisses or throw the cereal off the table and join in – is a desperate grab in the dark for what the new generation, or next wave of parenting techniques will look like.
Like any other meditative advice, the best way I’ve found, (apart from living it and staying as present as possible), is to keep it simple. One or two phrases are more than enough to remember in a day full of biscuit baking and leafing through the old favourites on the book shelf, and so I’ve shrunk it down into a few simple phrases… Zen style.
Since the woman was having great trouble and being the gentleman that he was, one of the monks offered to carry her across on his shoulders. She accepted and they began to wade across; they reached the other side where he set her down, she thanked him and went her own way. The monks carried on in silence. ‘Why did you carry that woman across the river?’ The monk asked the other in dismay, ‘We are not allowed to talk to, touch… even let our eyes fall upon a woman let alone carry her! What were you thinking?’ The other monk listened with a smile upon his lips, then softly said. ‘But I put her down when I crossed the river. Why are you still carrying her?’
“We all wear masks, and the time comes when we cannot remove them without removing some of our own skin.” ~ André Berthiaume
“If everything goes well & sex is natural & flowing, it is a beautiful experience because you can have a glimpse of the second through it. If sex goes really very deep, so that you forget yourself completely in it, you can even have a glimpse of third through it. And if the sex becomes a totally orgasmic experience you can even have a glimpse of the fourth, Turiya the beyond through it.” ~ Osho
